Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Our Own Steps

We walk. We stumble, we trudge, we plod, trip, shuffle... you get the idea. Often times, we do it all with our own two feet. I know I'm prone to that... I do it with "my" steps. "My" way. And I fall, many times, flat on my face.

I'm reminded of that popular saying, "Let go and let God." But I'm not looking at God. I'm looking at others. I'm looking at women who have little children, full houses to run, and still have flourishing craft businesses, plus time to write blogs, Tweet, Pin, etc. And here I am, sitting on the couch (also my Mom's bed), watching tv with my 2 little ones. I nap when they nap. I draw (sometimes) at work (I work 3 hours a night) taking care of an old woman who generally sleeps. I rarely have time to ever bring out my computer at home.

Where am I going with this ramble? I have no idea. I just know that so much is missing. I need to increase my relationship with God. I need to learn how to begin working with Kyle (4) on reading. I need to clean rather than tidy up. I need to make dinners rather than chicken nuggets or hot dogs (how did people exist before microwaves?) I need to learn how to play with my children... they won't be little forever. I just always feel so tired and am putting one step in front of the other, plodding on, in my own steps...

It's time for a change. I want to be a better mother. I want to be a better Child of God.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi Jen. You have great goals. Start with your relationship with God and forget about the other moms who can Pin, create and keep blogs. Sorry I don't have a pep talk for you, just know that I understand, and I pray. Nelly

Lovealittle said...

Hi Jen, I just want to give you a huge bear hug.

You are the right Mum for your kids and God loves you and the little ones.

Look up to Him and try not to dwell on others. spend time with the little ones and enjoy their early years ...they will be over in the flash of time.

We all fall flat on our faces at times and God is there to catch us every time.

I pray that you are lifted up by those around you and that you know your worth as a Child of God. We do not have to earn God's love

Jane xxxx

sammysgrammy said...

Jen, I'm praying that the Lord will give you His thoughts about what happens in the (roughly) 14 hours that you're awake each day. You work for 3 of them. I'm assuming you have to travel to and from that work - so an hour? more. That's 4 hours spoken for. There are 10 more. Those are the ones I'm praying that you will get the mind of the Lord about.
From The Message Bible....Psalm 31:15 "hour by hour I place my days in Your hand."

Jessica Backer said...

Jen Hugs to you, if we are honest a lot of us mom's can say the same thing. Remember God loves you and your little ones. I guarantee your little ones would say that you are the greatest mom in the whole wide world.
Teresa

Lorrie Esposito said...

((Jen)) You are on the right track, God first. It will all fall into place as He wills it. Your kids are taken care of, they love you and they know how much you love them that's all that matters. God always meets us where we're at and gives us what we need when we need it. Keep the faith sister. You are in my prayers.

Yolanda (silvercloud07) said...

(((Jen)))
We can all be better at whatever we do, I'm sure. A lot of people who seem so put together are the ones who are scrambling when no one is looking. Don't worry about them. You live your life. Praying for you.

Kiel said...

Hugs, Jen! I know how you feel, really I do! And I am glad you are reaching out and letting people know how you feel, and especially crying out to God for guidance. I strongly encourage you to visit Rachel Martin's blog "Finding Joy." Her posts never fail to encourage me, and I think they will speak to you as well. http://rachelmariemartin.blogspot.com/2013/10/the-mom-confession.html
Kiel

Amanda said...

Hi, Jen,
I think so many of us feel like we are stumbling about. I almost always feel like what I am doing isn't what I should be doing. If I am playing with my son, then I should be cleaning or cooking. If I am working, then I should be playing!

It is only through God that we find peace. I actually wrote about my own stumbling on my blog earlier this week.
http://thouartfaithful.blogspot.com/2013/10/confessions.html
You are certainly not alone.

I would recommend Matthew 6:25-34. I find comfort there when I feel like life is spinning away from me.

Blessings,
Amanda

Kelly Bermudez said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kelly Bermudez said...

I love your heart!....and I know God does too:)

Kelly Bermudez said...

I love your heart!....and I know God does too:)

Mechelle said...

Definitely start your relationship with the Lord. Next stop comparing yourself. We as women are constantly struggling with wanting what others have. We all do this. I pray the Lord's grace would just pour down on you. Keep growing and learning. One day at a time.

Pam of alwaysartistic said...

Sometimes it seems there is not enough time in the day / week / month to accomplish what we want to do... hope you can figure out a way to do it :)